The "Ready" Conversation: A Look at the Importance of Relationship

Presenters

Charles Holt, Charles HoltFollow

Focused Area

Improving School Climate for Youth-At-Risk

Relevance to Focused Area

This proposal speaks to a wide spectrum of students. All have had a relationship, or lack of relationship with their fathers. Although this piece would slightly favor talks on those individuals who have experienced the lack, or scarcity, of the presence of a father in the home, there is no doubt that all young men will come through this rite of passage as it pertains to relationship.

Primary Strand

Social & Emotional Skills

Relevance to Primary Strand

The most important relationships that a child fosters early in life are with loving parents. Both mother and father play critical roles in shaping a child’s formative years and understanding of the world. If those relationships are strained, for whatever reason, it can set a young person down a road of despair and potentially toward a life that is less fulfilling? The relationship, or should I say lack of, with my father created emotional distress very early in my life. And though I did not acquire some of the more extreme behaviors typically indicative of emotional trauma (incarceration, drugs, gangs, violence and abuse), my journey was nonetheless filled with challenges that lingered, spilling over into other areas of my life. The circumstances of my upbringing and youth, however, did not thwart my efforts to overcome and achieve. As a Broadway actor, former college athlete and business executive for the IBM corporation, I’ve acquired valued life skills on how to find and create happiness and success in a society plagued by social inequality. These lessons have given me important insight on how to navigate through the ups and downs of life to find one’s voice, passion and purpose.

Brief Program Description

This workshop session will use the concepts of seven powers that I developed in the workbook The Seven Powers to Healing and Freedom, the companion journal to my book Between Me and Dad: A Journey through Forgiveness to Freedom. Seven powers are principles and tools for training which help to develop an awareness of human experiences and emotions in order to facilitate self-healing and self-emancipation from the travails of past life experiences.

- Power of Recall

- Power of Recognition

- Power of Release

- Power of Compassion

- Power of Reconciliation

- Power of Creative Authenticity

- Power of You

Target audience: youth, young adult, adult

Summary

During the presentation there will be time given to short exercises, allowing each individual the opportunity to take introspect and evaluation as encouragement to the next level of action and participation beyond the classroom. The class will conclude with comments by attendees and the creating of a personal oath and pledge.

Tools used for this work include:

- Breathing techniques (deep and releasing)

- Meditation/Silence

- Nature Talks and Nature Walks

- Instructive/Constructive dialogues and creative outlets (music, poems, writing, conversation)

- Community participation

Evidence

There have been several studies that chronicle the patterns and trajectory of a young man whose life has been positively effected by the relationship with his father. Studies have shown the possibilities for both sides of the coin: healthy and civil relationship as well as dysfunctional and non-existent relationships. Many authors argue that the father is a primary role model, adding to his son's understanding of life and his path in creating his own. From self respect, to respect of others, academic success, social intelligence, values, moral behavior, emotional and physical health, and purposeful living, the relationship of father to his son is vital and invaluable to a boy's development and livelihood. When there is an absence of a relationship or presence of a father in the home, boys grow up without role models and guides. THis perpetuates the lack of order, guidance, self respect, economic stability, and a list of skills needed to navigate through life at all levels of development, and all the different sections of life: physical, financial, mental, and emotional. This proposal looks at the emotional effects of dysfunction between fathers and sons and how this behavior can create a refectory of pain, deep disappointment, blame, shame, and resentment within the son. To go even further, this particular proposal briefly looks at a model relationship of dysfunction, but then opens the gate to understanding how a young boy can begin to navigate through the struggles, effects, and hardship of an emotionally disconnected and strained relationship.

Format

Poster Presentation

Biographical Sketch

The art of Mr. Holt’s work serves as a blueprint for creating sustainable and healthy connections with the people who are a part of our lives. As a framework, he facilitates workshops and retreats based from his personal experience, which he talks about in his recent book, Between Me and Dad, and through guided curriculum sourced from his companion journal, The 7 Powers to Healing and Freedom. These platforms serve as strong foundations that assist us in giving ourselves permission to access skills and tools that encourage our personal growth and success with others.

Increased self-awareness and intention of purpose carries our relationships into the stream of understanding the expanded version of the individual - Community. It requires courage, empathy and participation, and Mr. Holt’s work teaches how to creatively demonstrate the benefits of effective communication, while learning the importance of discerning the real and true essence of our lives and what really matters to us.

Start Date

11-5-2015 5:45 PM

End Date

11-5-2015 6:45 PM

Recommended Citation

Holt, Charles, "The "Ready" Conversation: A Look at the Importance of Relationship" (2015). National Youth-At-Risk Conference, West (2015-2017). 6.
https://digitalcommons.georgiasouthern.edu/nyar_vegas/2015/poster/6